Day 19.  I finally achieved a task set for me by my coach months ago.  Some of you will know this. I emailed every person that I had an email address for, to tell them about my business.  You will also know by now that exposure has been a challenge for me, so this email had to be right.  I set myself up on Mailchimp, learned how to use it, and then finally got a friend to go through the draft with me.  I set it up to go out last night (whilst I was at Choir, so I didn’t have to think about it!)

I feel excited that it’s out there.  But what held me back from doing this sooner was fear.  Fear of people’s responses.  My friend asked me what was ‘the worst thing that could happen?’  Good question.  My answer – every single person will unsubscribe, and then my website will self destruct and my computer will explode, and that will be it – game over.  Dramatic huh?!  To do this I had to be authentic, vulnerable and take a risk that people would judge this, positively or negatively.

We can think about this using a traffic-light model.  The people that will unsubscribe are clearly red – they are not interested in my work, they may dislike or even hate me.  There is no sitting on the fence with this group.  I know where I stand.

People that are green are the people from whom I have received messages of support, almost immediate emails, phone calls or text messages, saying that they are inspired, they want to work with me and wishing me well for the future.  These are my people!  They are on my side, I’m delighted to have them!

And then there are the amber group.  These are people on the fence, they have no investment in me or anything I do.  They like me well enough, but probably better if I do things to appease them, which in turn reduces my authenticity.

So what I really want is Reds and Greens.  I know exactly where I am with them.  I can be my real self and they will clearly let me know how they feel about this in one way or another.  The point is to actually get rid of the ambers!  Be authentic, take the risk that people will have strong reactions either way.

Either way, I survived.  My computer did not explode, my website did not self-destruct, and a few people have unsubscribed.

Day 20 – Triathlon swimming training starts tonight.